Post ivf seminar.
I've been emotionally out of touch. I think I can say confidently we both have been. Our mindset: Yeah... We'll do ivf... But no surprises if it doesn't work either.
We have been coming to grips with the fact that our problem is kinda like a miracle. We pray for miracles but really babies being conceived isn't miraculous, it's biological. It's meant to happen when sperm and egg meet they just might make a baby. Our miracle is that when his sperm meets my egg it bounces off! That's the miracle. And yes it's effing ironic but not comical.
Sitting amongst the 50 or so couples last night I'm looking around actually feeling a little better about our miracle problem. Infertility looks like a mixed race middle to upper class anybody aged 30-50. Happily it was Dr. Loy's turn to lead the seminar (the 7 Drs. from the practice rotate each month). He is so confident. Reminds me of chad. It's a quiet confidence that you don't mess with but never feel the need to question. He's been doing ivf since 1984 (for frame of reference the 1st ivf birth was in 1978 in the UK) so I'm pretty sure I have one of the most experienced docs in the world.. Literally.
Prior to the meeting the insurance agent in me was pretty sold on the idea of paying about 35k up front for 2-3 fresh + 2-3 frozen cycles of ivf with the money back guarantee if unsuccessful (@ 70% back). Part of the seminar he touched on it and said that with how successful they are in 2 cycles that route in his opinion isn't necessary. It's nice to see him so confident in his abilities and clearly offended that there is a doubters way to go about it.
Chad and I have made the decision to leave the decision up to Dr. Loy. We know what he's going to say but his confidence rubs off on us well so it'll be nice to hear him tell us that he thinks we can do it in 2 cycles max. Pretty sure chad already wanted to go at it this route but b/c I do all the finances for us he wasn't all that pushy in his opinion. I sensed some relief in his voice when I piped up on the way home and said that I'm fine leaving the financial route up to the doctor.
The first will be fresh the second frozen. Here's the wild part... The frozen technique is called vitrification. It's immediate freezing (he compares the state to glass). The thawing is almost completely guaranteed and the frozen stats of the embryo sticking are better than fresh stats. Dr Loy said that though the studies are still being done on why, his theory is that b/c the frozen embryo is being placed back into mom in a more natural environment (as opposed to the fresh which it's placed back after all the stimulation meds) it's more likely to stick. I'm wondering if we can just go that route from cycle one. I'll ask him when we go for our consult (which is yet to be determined. I have to call cycle day 1 then go from there to the next steps) if we can freeze all embryos and then put it back once all the meds are out of me. Who knows. Maybe the success %'s are so close fresh v. frozen that its of no consequence but ill ask anyhoo.
At the end they did a Q&A and again I realized how "easy" we have it. One man asked about the testicular biopsy he has to do. Meaning he has zero sperm in his ejaculate and they have found that in some sterile men they can use sperm found in the biopsy to use for ivf. One lady had some wild tube issue where it's recommended to remove both tubes prior to pregnancy/ivf procedure to avoid miscarriage due to some weird hostile fluid issue. One lady had a surrogate and the couple had to do all these genetic screenings of the embryo and fetus to check for disease. Just crazy issues that I can be thankful aren't ours. Still not rejoicing that our powers combined are rendered biologically ineffective but glad that ivf should be a walk in the park for the doctors.
Now I just need to start my period so we can get moving! It's been a while since I was happily anticipating aunt flow.